she woke up with a sticky ear
operation harelip BJ is a go
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
Randomize
