I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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