So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
Randomize
