Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
operation have a gay friend backfired
I'm always impressed by your drunken ability to quickly gauge how long it's been since you've shaved and whether or not your prospective hook up will care.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
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