Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Randomize
