So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
Randomize
