Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
Randomize
