Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
Randomize
