Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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