I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
Randomize