There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
Randomize
