Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
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