the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
Hey, it was your idea to keep her occupied with the barscanner on your phone.
you didnt need to give her a fucking sharpie. there are handmade barcodes everywhere. including my cock. fucker.
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
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