i think my mom watched the whole time
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
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