would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
Randomize
