I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
New low. Found an ant nibbling on my last xanax. Flicked it away and popped it in my mouth anyways.
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
Randomize
