You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
Thanks for feeding me more tequila shots to prevent me from trying to fight her last night. Horrible logic? Yes, but you are the best friend ever
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
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