everytime i eat a fruit i feel like i'm eating ovaries
Its about making memories worth repressing
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
50% drunk capacity currently
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
Randomize
