Whod you bang
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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