Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
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