It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize
