I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
The police scanner is talking about you again....
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
Randomize
