So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
found the other keg... it's in the tree
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Randomize
