Don't you send me to vm
I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
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