Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
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