New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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