David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Randomize