my mouth tastes like poor choices
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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