If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
Randomize
