At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
Randomize
