Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Randomize
