I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
Oh my god. I opened up my microwave and there was a pile of bacon in it. It's like my mother knew I'd be hungover.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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