Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
I have post one night stand depression
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize
