found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Guess who just stumbled into work hungover, wearing yesterday's clothes, covered in hickeys and glitter, and carrying a giant bottle of rum in her purse.
I just took plan B at work.
This is the greatest story of all time.
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
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