Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
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