you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
Great parenting moment: noticing your kid is going to puke from gorging fish sticks and sending her outside. Then watching her puke on your dog.
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
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