How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
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