Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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