She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
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