i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
Randomize
