My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
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