how do flat chested girls get laid?
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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