i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
should my penis look like a turkey
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
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