Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
Found an elderly homeless guy with a Gandalf beard passed out on my porch. I put a Santa hat over his erect dick cause he was naked.
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
