she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
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