OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
you said youd get me home safely, you dropped me off at 9:30 last night and i just woke up on my porch.
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
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