I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
