she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
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