Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize
