Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
He did a backflip because drugs
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